Dear 10 year old me,
You’ve just gone through your first tough moment of your life, your parents are getting a divorce and the ride has been rough. Your Daddy is about to walk into your life and introduce you to the love of horses. Horses will teach you a lot, they will teach you patience, kindness, freedom and will be the ‘therapy’ you never knew you needed.
Your weekends mucking out 52 horses, filling hay nets and grooming ponies for the chance to get a ‘free’ hack out will pay off. The hard work, early mornings cycling to the stables in despair to spend time with the horses will be the best 5 years of your life. You will make life long friends both human and fluffy. Savour these moments. Savour the smells, sounds, savour the laughter and the memories. Life right now seems perfect and it is but you have big things to overcome. There is no way on earth you can prepare yourself for what is to come when you’re 15, so don’t panic about it for now and thoroughly enjoy your teenage years. Hug your friends hard, tell you you love them often and take more pictures. I know mobile phones won’t be great for a while. Pictures will be awful but have them to cherish.
When that night in March comes you won’t panic, you’re good in an emergency. It will be traumatic, you will have to grow up very quickly and it will affect you for the rest of your life. What you need to do is be proud of yourself. Take pride in how you dealt with the situation. Take pride in the fact you helped your friends until the end. Domenic would be proud of you so take that and remember it when times get tough later on.
The next few years you live as normal grown up life. You work hard, play hard and horses will be there for you. One horse in particular ‘Cow pony’ will capture you’re heart forever. It will be a rollercoaster of emotions, exams and relationships. One of those relationships gets pretty serious, you change your name and move countries. Once you move you will grow, you will find the ‘you’ that is strong, fiery and knows exactly what she wants. You work hard and achieve everything that you set out to despite the turbulence. Relationships are hard and even when you think you have it all right it will fall apart. Initially you will think your world has ended but darling this is just the beginning.
I urge you to look after yourself, live selfishly. Put your feelings first because you will quickly realise that only you can make yourself happy. You are a loving and caring woman who prides herself on being a faithful friend. You keep your circle small but important and I think as you pick your friends growing up bare this in mind.
Before I go, before you turn the big THREE ZERO your life will slot into place. You will meet Sam, Sam is special, love him like you’ve never loved before. After the heart break of parting ways with ‘Cow Pony’ a Colin will walk into your life. He will challenge you in ways you never imagined. He will give you your love of owning a horse back again. You will become the rider you’ve always dreamt of being and hopefully (I’m yet to find out) climb to the highest height together.
P.S – Have fun my girl
P.P.S – Practice using YouTube now you may want to be good at it when you’re older
P.P.P.S – You’re never too young to start looking after your skin